Aphorisms by theme: Wit

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Mark Twain

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Fortune is like a coquette; if you don`t run after her, she will run after you.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Women are very practical. They are a lot more practical than us. A man often forgets about marriage in the moment of pleasure, but the woman always reminds him.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Marriage Men Wit Women
A diplomat who says "yes" means "maybe", a diplomat who says "maybe" means "no", and a diplomat who says "no" is not a diplomat.

Charles Maurice de Talleyrand

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
Compliments are often insincere, but fault-finding is always genuine.

Edgar Watson Howe

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?

Jean Cocteau

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Even snakes are afraid of snakes.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Sigmund Freud said he did not know what women want. I know what they want. They want to deal with a whole bunch of people.

Kurt Vonnegut

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit Women
It does not matter what temperature the room is, it is always room temperature.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
A woman finds those men clever who share her opinion and not the opinion of her husband.

Jean Rostand

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit Women
Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.

Paul Valery

This author aphorisms
By theme : Politics Wit
Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?

Jean Cocteau

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
May God defend me from my friends; I can defend myself from my enemies.

Voltaire

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
Are naked women intelligent?

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
An adventure is only an inconvenience rightly considered. An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton

This author aphorisms
By theme : Thought Wit
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

Jules Renard

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
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