Aphorisms by theme: Wit

The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn`t been asleep.

Wilson Mizner

This author aphorisms
By theme : Success Wit
It`s perfectly understandable that the wolves call for the sheep to be disarmed. Sheep`s wool offers a certain resistance to the wolf`s bite.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton

This author aphorisms
By theme : Politics Wit
A hen is only an egg`s way of making another egg.

Samuel Butler

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
If the facts don`t fit the theory, change the facts.

Albert Einstein

This author aphorisms
By theme : Science Wit
The devil is the father of lies, but he neglected to patent the idea, and the business now suffers from competition.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Lie Wit
Acquaintance: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

Ambrose Bierce

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone.

Henry David Thoreau

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wealth Wit
Beyond each corner new directions lie in wait.

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Marriage: A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join.

Elbert Hubbard

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Marriage Wit
Whenever you hear a man speak of his love for his country, it is a sign that he expects to be paid for it.

Henry Louis Mencken

This author aphorisms
By theme : Patriotism Wit
To avoid mistakes and regrets always consult your wife before engaging in a flirtation.

Edgar Watson Howe

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wife Wit
To succeed in the world it is not enough to be stupid, you must also be well mannered.

Voltaire

This author aphorisms
By theme : Society Stupidity Success Wit
When a man spends his time giving his wife criticism and advice instead of compliments, he forgets that it was not his good judgment, but his charming manners, that won her heart.

Helen Rowland

This author aphorisms
By theme : Husband Relations Wife Wit
A celebrity is one who is known to many persons he is glad he doesn`t know.

Henry Louis Mencken

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Person Relations Wit
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.

Dorothy Parker

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Theory is when we know everything but nothing works. Praxis is when everything works but we do not know why. We always end up by combining theory with praxis: nothing works and we do not know why.

Albert Einstein

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Science Wit
The man who listens to reason is lost: reason enslaves all whose minds are not strong enough to master her.

George Bernard Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Reason Wit
Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can`t sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can`t sleep with the window open.

George Bernard Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Marriage Men Relations Wit Women
The two most beautiful words in the English language are "cheque enclosed".

Dorothy Parker

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Divorce is probably of nearly the same date as marriage. I believe, however, that marriage is some weeks the more ancient.

Voltaire

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Marriage Wit
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