Aphorisms by theme: Wit

My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.

Fred Allen

This author aphorisms
By theme : Childhood Humor Wit
It`s risky in a marriage for a man to come home too late, but it can sometimes pose an even greater risk if he comes home too early.

Marcel Achard

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Marriage Wit
He must be very ignorant for he answers every question he is asked.

Voltaire

This author aphorisms
By theme : Behavior Knowledge Wit
Every man wants a woman to appeal to his better side, his nobler instincts, and his higher nature - and another woman to help him forget them.

Helen Rowland

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Men Wit Women
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.

Niels Bohr

This author aphorisms
By theme : Science Wit
Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.

George Bernard Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit Youth
Hospital is a place where they wake you up to give you a sleeping pill.

Bertrand Russell

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit Women
The art of prophecy is very difficult - especially with respect to the future.

Mark Twain

This author aphorisms
By theme : Future Humor Wit
Perhaps to our senses things offer only their rejections. Perfume is what flowers throw away.

Paul Valery

This author aphorisms
By theme : Feelings Philosophy Wit
Add a few drops of venom to a half truth and you have an absolute truth.

Eric Hoffer

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Truth Wit
Women have a passion for mathematics. They divide their age in half, double the price of their clothes, and always add at least five years to the age of their best friend.

Marcel Achard

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit Women
Nothing pleases a woman quite so well as to look so sweet that a man wants to kiss her, and then abuse him for his impudence.

Edgar Watson Howe

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Behavior Wit Women
Can the cannibal speak in the name of those he ate?

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
If you do not know how to lie, cheat and steal, turn your attention to politics and learn.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Politics Wit
Don`t ever prophesy; for if you prophesy wrong, nobody will forget it; and if you prophesy right, nobody will remember it.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
One of the surprising things in this world is the respect a worthless man has for himself.

Edgar Watson Howe

This author aphorisms
By theme : Psychology Wit
The career of a writer is comparable to that of a woman of easy virtue. You write first for pleasure, later for the pleasure of others and finally for money.

Marcel Achard

This author aphorisms
By theme : Art Creativity Humor Wit
A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Mark Twain

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Brevity is the soul of wit.

William Shakespeare

This author aphorisms
By theme : Wit
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