Aphorisms by theme: Humor

It does not matter what temperature the room is, it is always room temperature.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor
Even snakes are afraid of snakes.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?

Jean Cocteau

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By theme : Humor Wit
Are naked women intelligent?

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

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By theme : Humor Wit
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

Steven Wright

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By theme : Humor Wit
OK, so what`s the speed of dark?

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
True love is not what stands many years of separation, but the one which withstands many years of intimacy.

Helen Rowland

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Love Wit
Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

Woody Allen

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By theme : Humor Wit
We don`t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

George Bernard Shaw

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By theme : Humor Wit
To you I`m an atheist, but for God I`m a constructive opposition.

Woody Allen

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By theme : Humor Wit
Beware of women who do not hide their age. A woman who reveals her age is capable of anything.

Oscar Wilde

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By theme : Humor Wit Women
Families with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other.

Edgar Watson Howe

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By theme : Humor Wit
The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

Dorothy Parker

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By theme : Humor Wit
Egotist. A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.

Ambrose Bierce

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By theme : Egoism Humor Wit
Committee - a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.

Fred Allen

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By theme : Humor Wit
Martyrdom is the only way to become famous without having any chances for that.

George Bernard Shaw

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By theme : Humor Wit
Money may not buy happiness, but I`d rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.

Francoise Sagan

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By theme : Humor Money Wit
When everything is coming your way, you`re in the wrong lane.

Steven Wright

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By theme : Humor Wit
A politician is a statesman who approaches every question with an open mouth.

Adlai E. Stevenson

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By theme : Humor Politics Wit
It is unhealthy to live. He who lives, dies.

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Life Wit
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