Aphorisms by theme: Humor

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.

Mark Twain

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By theme : Humor Wit
Fortune is like a coquette; if you don`t run after her, she will run after you.

Henry Wheeler Shaw

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By theme : Humor Wit
Compliments are often insincere, but fault-finding is always genuine.

Edgar Watson Howe

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By theme : Humor Wit
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?

Jean Cocteau

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By theme : Humor Wit
Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us.

Oscar Wilde

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By theme : Humor Wit
Even snakes are afraid of snakes.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
It does not matter what temperature the room is, it is always room temperature.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
It does not matter what temperature the room is, it is always room temperature.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor
Even snakes are afraid of snakes.

Steven Wright

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor
I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?

Jean Cocteau

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By theme : Humor Wit
Are naked women intelligent?

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

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By theme : Humor Wit
I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

Steven Wright

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By theme : Humor Wit
OK, so what`s the speed of dark?

Steven Wright

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By theme : Humor Wit
True love is not what stands many years of separation, but the one which withstands many years of intimacy.

Helen Rowland

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Love Wit
Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

Woody Allen

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By theme : Humor Wit
We don`t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

George Bernard Shaw

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By theme : Humor Wit
To you I`m an atheist, but for God I`m a constructive opposition.

Woody Allen

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By theme : Humor Wit
Beware of women who do not hide their age. A woman who reveals her age is capable of anything.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit Women
Families with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other.

Edgar Watson Howe

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
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