Aphorisms by theme: Humor

The Bible tells us to love our neighbors and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.

Mark Twain

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Religion Wit
Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.

Dorothy Parker

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
Don`t tell your dreams. What if the Freudists come to power?

Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

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By theme : Humor Wit
Every generation laughs at the old fashions, but religiously follows the new.

Henry David Thoreau

This author aphorisms
By theme : Fashion Humor Society
The only charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception necessary for both parties.

Oscar Wilde

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By theme : Cynicism Humor Marriage
Of all the noises known to man, opera is the most expensive.

Moliere

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By theme : Humor Wit
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

Oscar Wilde

This author aphorisms
By theme : Fashion Humor
Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

George Bernard Shaw

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Relations Wit
I generally avoid temptation unless I can`t resist it.

Mae West

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.

Zsa Zsa Gabor

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Love Marriage Men
Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you; after marriage, he won`t even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Helen Rowland

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By theme : Humor Marriage Men Relations Wit
Great Britain and the United States are nations separated by a common language.

George Bernard Shaw

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By theme : Humor Wit
In America, anyone can become president. That`s one of the risks you take.

Adlai E. Stevenson

This author aphorisms
By theme : Democracy Humor Politics Wit
Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung.

Voltaire

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By theme : Humor Wit
Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

Mark Twain

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor
The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it`s their fault.

Henry Kissinger

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By theme : Humor Person Wit
There is only one thing to do for a man who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it.

Edgar Watson Howe

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By theme : Humor Men Money Wit Women
The only time that most women give their orating husbands undivided attention is when the old boys mumble in their sleep.

Wilson Mizner

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By theme : Humor Husband Wife
A woman isn`t complete without a man. But where do you find a man - a real man - these days?

Mae West

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Men Women
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.

Dorothy Parker

This author aphorisms
By theme : Humor Wit
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